I have noone other than myself to blame, always its an ongoing problem. Really what am I doing? do I really think after the hundredth time that oh maybe this time it will be different.. to be honest I guess I do in a way I keep giving out these chances you so desperately ask for to just be let down time and time again. You want me when you can’t have me yet push me away when you get me. It as if as soon as you know I am happy again you are ignorant, push me away, and refuse to love me. It really taking a toll on me and I toll I’ve seen far too many times I can’t put myself in this situation anymore, Its not healthy! Saturday night when you laid your head on me just like old times, I honestly in my heart felt like the games were over for once that you were mine for now and for the time being. I always just want to trust you so badly and day by day you are losing my trust more quickly than ever. If you really loved me and felt the things you say you feel for me wouldn’t you just want me to be happy and I mean really happy even if its not with you. If you don’t want me fine but you have to let me go fully first or maybe I should just let go fully. I wish someone knew how I felt anyone really?
